Sometimes I hate you. Other times I love you. What happened? We lost everything and now where….Here again? Not here there is some fog and I can’t see threw it on most days. My stubbornness or yours? I’m losing track of the days. They are all just melting together. I miss the old days. I really miss the old days. Come back soon.
Vøringfossen.. by Pawel Kucharski
I have finally decided as soon as my graduation from the fire academy is over I will be on the first plane out of here. Not to live in some other state but to join the peace core. I’m tired of trying to find excuses to stay over here and not join them. I have no more my excuse is over and done with. I want to see that nook of the world that no one else cares about. I need to find myself and this may be the way to find it. I should of left a year ago let alone in 2 years from now. But people get in the way and your made out to look like the nut job. Well maybe I am that nut job. So be it I’ll be a nut job far far away from you and here. Why not the military? Because I don’t want to hurt or injure anyone I want to help. That’s all I’ve ever wanted to do so come this time in 2 years I’m gone. No more looking for reasons to stay I have none never have had any. So this is my reinsurance that when the time comes for me to be gone I’ll be gone.
You have choose your life thus far no? I like to think no too. Truth be told we are all where we are because we asked for it or sometimes it really does just fall in our laps and we have to handle it the best we can. But a good part is we asked for this not in words but in actions. Winter is coming and you will be cold by yourself. Just what you have asked for. It’s funny when it rains and the sun shines threw. Makes you think there is hope for the world. Times are changing and people are growing old. Old and heart but not in soul. This is just how the world turns isn’t it. Into a cold world of old hearts. I’m a bit tired of fighting this war might as well lay down and let it consume you.
Then I apologies. It was the wrong day to see that in my inbox. Half the time I get asked that it’s in a offensive way. I’m sorry for coming off so rude.
Haha I assume that this is a real question. So I guess I’ll answer? But before that can I ask why it matters if I’m gay or not? Why are you straight? Did you choose to be straight? If your a straight girl why do you like dick? Why should I be straight? Would that help you sleep better at night to know someone that you know nothing about is straight? Would that make your life easier? Would slavery come back if I “stayed” gay for another day? Is the world going to imploded if women walk down the street holding hands with other women? How about if men did it? Why is it that you have so much time on your hands to find me and ask me this ridiculous question? What difference does it make? Oh hey you want to know some facts? In the state of Florida it is legal to marry your first cousin. Would you do that? Or did you know Just about 2 or 3 years ago the just made bestiality illegal? Would you fuck an animal? All these things are ok in society to do. Why not instead of asking me why i’m gay (because I don’t get asked this a million and one times in a day) Go be proactive and talk to all those sick fucks and ask if homos did this to them. Try a better question next time.
“When we try hard, we never work. When we don’t try at all, we work.” Truth be told your right. Sad part is I tried. Really fucking hard too. But I guess this is what happens when society wins. I’m at the same spot I’ve always been at. I see why you told me to be patient now. Because you didn’t want to deal with the bullshit yet. Well I’m sorry that anything me and you were was bullshit. You don’t even have enough balls to tell me. Ignored and denied. Moral codes should never be broken because this is where they get you. Absolutely nowhere. Now what is sadder me actually caring about this when I knew very well what the most plausible outcome would be, or the fact that if you called me right now and asked for anything in the world I would never question it and do what ever it was that you needed? I should of known better. I knew better with everyone else but you. Why you were that exception I still know. Why I still know your an exception I have no clue. So the next time your with him you can tell him from the “player” he won. Because this is not how “players” get girls. Very true maybe this time I will learn my lesson.